Finding the one you love is a very joyous & life changing experience and yet, relationships can be challenging and require a lot of work! I believe there is hope for relationships if both people are open to some exploration about their individual love styles, their sexual & romantic blueprints, and learning healthy techniques to communicate in a new way so each person in the relationship feels truly heard.
Let me ask you a few questions. . .
Do you sometimes feel very alone & isolated within your relationship? Have you begun to resent your partner and think if only he or she would change then we could be happy?
Are you in a long term relationship and you feel the spark was lost a long time ago and you’re wondering if it’s possible to reignite those passions?
Are you thinking about getting married or moving into together and you’re worried about keeping the spark alive or fearful that you’ll end up in an unhappy relationship?
Do you ever feel bored or confused by your partners needs & wants?
Do you ever wonder if you can truly desire what you already have? Is this desire a worthwhile pursuit or are stability & intimacy the primary goals to create in your relationship together?
Keeping passion and excitement alive is a hard task in any long term relationship, but the good news, it’s not impossible!
If you’ve answered yes to a few of these questions, this is a good time to reach out for support.
The truth is, we all want a loving and stable relationship. However, in our pursuit of becoming “one” with our partners we often stifle the very thing that will keep the marriage alive & vibrant, which is a sense of mystery and independence. Intimacy and stability often do not lead to happy marriages, it’s actually a strange paradox, the closer we become the farther apart we seem to find ourselves. Esther Perel, (Mating in Captivity) writes about this paradox, “We seek a steady, reliable anchor in our partner. Yet at the same time we expect love to offer a transcendent experience that will allow us to soar beyond or ordinary lives. The challenge for modern couples lies in reconciling the need for what’s safe and predictable with the wish to pursue what’s exciting, mysterious, and awe-inspiring.”
I’m interested in working with couples who want to find out about themselves and are interested in exploring their own inner lives, which requires a desire to be curious about the assumptions you make about your relationship and asks you to engage in different ways with your partner, which might be challenging to you both.
I like to work with couples in 1.5 hour session in the beginning of our work together, because I have found that a 50-minute session is just not long enough to really get to the heart of the issues most couples are facing.
I will want you to fill out some paperwork before you come to first session that you will need email back to me. If you’re interested in this type of couples counseling, just give me a call and we will set something up and I will email you the intake forms.